Hi Reader, There are dreams we decide not to pursue. And then there are dreams we simply stop talking about. I think those are different. Sometimes life changes. We learn more about ourselves. Something we once wanted genuinely stops fitting, and letting it go is its own kind of wisdom. But sometimes the dream is still there. We just got quieter about it. Maybe because it stopped feeling practical. Maybe because someone we loved did not understand it. Maybe because we became responsible for...
about 1 month ago • 5 min read
Hi Reader, If you have ever code-switched in a meeting, you know what I mean before I say it. You adjusted your voice. You softened a word. You laughed at something that was not quite funny. You translated your Sunday into something the Monday room could hold. You did this because it worked. You did this because it kept you in the room, at the table, on the promotion track, in the conversation. For some of us, code-switching was about race. For others, it was about gender. Or class. Or...
2 months ago • 5 min read
Hi Reader, If you have ever been the only one in the room, you know what I mean before I say it. The only woman. The only Black person. The only one who grew up the way you grew up. The only one carrying something the rest of the room does not see. There is a particular kind of invisible work that comes with being the only one. It is not always loud. It does not always announce itself. But it shapes everything. How carefully you choose your words. How much you prepare before walking in. How...
3 months ago • 5 min read
Hi Reader, There are versions of ourselves we learn to become long before we realize how disconnected we feel from who we actually are. The capable version. The agreeable version. The version that knows how to read the room before speaking. The version that learned how to belong by becoming easier to hold. Many women become skilled at this. Not because we lack confidence. Because somewhere along the way, we learned visibility could come with consequences. So we adapt. We soften ourselves. We...
4 months ago • 4 min read
Hi Reader, I have been writing something I have not said out loud. Not because I did not have the words. Because I was still deciding if I was ready to tell the truth the way it deserved to be told. I recently finished the first draft of Dear Daughter. Even writing that feels like a shift. Because this is no longer something I am holding quietly. This is something I am building in the open. I have always known who I was writing for. My daughter. Women who are doing everything right and still...
5 months ago • 4 min read